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An immeasurable saddness
10-05-2010Life can be unbearably cruel sometimes. Gut-wrenchingly unfair and indescribably hopeless. Without going into too many details, as it is a story too sad to tell, and the world wide web isn't exactly the most desirable place to share such a tale, a family member is going through the hardest thing a parent will ever have to do, and more to the point, should never have to do.
When I first heard the news, the shock hit and I am ashamed to say I pushed it to the back of my mind. Not because I didn't have time, not because I didn't care but more so because it is a sadness I cannot in any way fathom. Even if I let my imagination wander in order to understand their pain, I can't. The reality is, even my imagination cannot go that far. It's almost as if the mind is protecting me from a sadness a person should never have to endure.
There are no words of comfort to offer someone in this situation, nothing can be said or done to ease the burden being carried and I really cannot imagine what these people are going through.
I wonder sometimes if there is a God, can a higher being really be responsible for unleashing this horrible thing on someone so undeserving. They say that what doesn't kill us will make us stronger. True perhaps, for the more trivial matters in life.
I have often wondered if I was having a run of bad luck. It seemed to be one thing after another at one stage in my life. How could I have been so selfish? Trivial matters compared to something like this. It is times like this I wonder if some worse fate lies in my future, maybe I have had it just a bit too easy so far, a good job, a nice home, supportive family, loving friends, ideal partner. It doesn't seem fair that such a fate only falls to some people. People, as I said, so undeserving of such a thing.
My heart goes out to them even if I cannot possibly understand their heartache, and I hope that they can get through this.
Tags: meanderings
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